Smiles have an edge over all other emotional expressions: the human brain prefers happy faces, recognizing them more readily and quickly that those with negative expressions--an effect known as the "happy face advantage." Some neuroscientists suggest that the brain has a system for positive feelings that stays primed for activity, causing people to be in upbeat moods more often than negative, and to have a more positive outlook on life.
That implies that Nature tends to foster positive relationships. Despite the all-too-prominent place of aggression in human affairs, we are not innately primed to dislike people from the start.
Even among complete strangers, a moment of playfulness, even outright silliness, forms an instant resonance. In what may be yet another instance of psychology trying to prove the obvious, pairs of strangers were assigned to play a series of silly games together. During the games one person had to talk through a straw while directing the other, wearing a blindfold, to toss a Nerf ball back and forth. The strangers invariably fell into guffaws at their haplessness.
When strangers played the same silly game without the blindfold and straw, however, they never cracked a smile. Yet the laughing pairs felt a strong, immediate sense of closeness, even after spending just a few minutes together.
Indeed, laughter may be the shortest distance between two brains, an unstoppable infectious spread that builds an instant social bond.
In a similar vein, 'Abdu'l-Baha described the infectious influence of smiling and happiness in the following terms:
A bright and happy face cheers people on their way. If you are sad, and pass a child who is laughing, the child, seeing your sad face, will cease to laugh, not knowing why. If the day be dark, how much a gleam of sunshine is prized; so . . . wear smiling happy faces, gleaming like sunshine in the darkness.
So don't forget to smile! :-)
4 comments:
This is a pilgrim's note but nevertheless one of my favorites (found in Dr. Furutan's Stories of Baha'u'llah):
"The Blessed Beauty often remarked: 'There are four qualities which I love to see manifested in people: first, enthusiasm and courage; second, a face wreathed in smiles and a radiant countenance; third, that they see all things with their own eyes and not through the eyes of others; fourth, the ability to carry a task, once begun, through to the end.'"
Matt :)
Dear Shahla,
Glad it made you smile! :-)
Dear Matt,
Thank you so much for sharing the note. It is one of my favorites as well!
I find these exhortations, along with the findings of the latest scientific research, to be very useful tools in keeping the concept of the importance of a smile in my consciousness. It is amazing how something so simple can have such a profound effect in terms of creating unity.
Vic,
I like your post. I have tried this more than once in a public place like in line at the post office... when a person turns towards you, smile (make it last a bit). I can say than in more than 50% of the cases you will get a smile back. Of course if you are in New York, the smile you get back might be a little worried...what up with her? Do I know her? In the South the person will beam: how are y'all doing today honey?
Try it, it's fun!
Dear Claudine,
Thank you so much for your comment! I will be sure to try what you suggest.
The other day, on the subway, I looked around and noticed that most people on public transportation maintain rather glum expressions. I wonder what it would be like if you looked around and all you saw were smiles and happy faces. It probably would have a profound effect on the rest of your day!
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